Grab a cup of coffee and join us for a few minutes each morning.

We will share encouragement and tips to help you parent children from hard places in the midst of a hard time for everyone.

Routines with Kids

July 9, 2020

Do you struggle with getting your kids to do the “next thing”? If so, routines can be your best strategy. Join Nikki today on Coffee with Chosen to hear practical ways to incorporate routines into daily interactions with foster and adopted children.

How to Say "No" Without Saying "No"

June 23, 2020

Are you tired of bad attitudes and disrespect after your kids hear the word “no” from you? Tune in today as Nikki gives us some reasons why hearing “no” is so difficult for children who have experienced trauma and what we can do about it.

The Ongoing Job of Adjusting Expectations

June 19, 2020

Adjusting expectations is an important part of foster and adoptive parenting. Determining when those adjustments need to be made, as well as in which direction they should go. is a challenge! Today Erika encourages us to continue making tweaks to what we expect.

How to Strengthen Your Support System

June 18, 2020

Do you have enough supportive people helping you on your foster and adoption journeys? Today Tera breaks down for us what an ideal support system should look like as we are parenting children from hard places.

Dealing with Disrespect

June 17, 2020

Are you tired of dealing with disrespect in your home? Sassy tones, talking back, and bad attitudes are common behaviors in children and teens who have experienced abuse and trauma. Today Nikki gives us some insight on how to handle disrespect in our families.

The Importance of Mindset

June 15, 2020

Today we are replaying one of the first episodes of Coffee with Chosen because the message is as important today as it was in March. Our world still doesn’t seem “back to normal” and our mindsets might not be in a great place. Erika challenges us to examine our inner monologues during a hard time.


Amplifying Essential Voices: Black, White & Us

June 12, 2020

Today Staci highlights a documentary that is especially helpful for white foster and adoptive parents raising black children. This extraordinary commentary on the complexities of trans-racial adoption is a must-watch resource.


Link to documentary: Black, White & Us
Link to resource page: Domino


Embracing Race

June 11, 2020

Navigating racism within foster and adoptive families can feel overwhelming, but we are here to make that easier for you! Today we are letting you know about one webinar, two websites, and a video with a trans-racial adoptee. These tools are meant to equip all of us to have the important conversations that will help our families and communities embrace race.

Embrace Race: Embrace Race
Be the Bridge: Be the Bridge

Listening to Transracial Adoptees

June 10, 2020

Discussing racism with the foster and adopted children in our families can be complex and feel uncomfortable. However, it is essential that we listen to their experiences with racism, as well as other voices of trans-racial adoptees. Today Staci shares two tips and two resources to help you get more comfortable with these conversations that must happen in our homes.

Watch the interview Transracial Adoption: A Family’s Experience and Advice to those Considering Adopting Transracially
Listen to Still Standing: A Conversation on Life as a Trans-Racial Adoptee with Kevin Hofmann
Read Kevin’s memoir Growing Up Black in White


Amplifying Essential Voices: Angela Tucker

June 9, 2020

This week we are learning from those who have first-hand experience with the complexities of race within foster care and adoption. Today we are introducing you to Angela Tucker, who is dedicated to sharing the experiences of transracial adoptees. We invite you to watch her short conversation with four teens as they discuss being parented by people of a different race. For more of Angela Tucker’s work, we encourage you to visit her website today where you can find her documentary, as well as information about her upcoming book release.

Amplifying Essential Voices: Susan Harris O'Connor

June 8, 2020

This week we are learning from those who have first-hand experience with the complexities of race within foster care and adoption. Today we are introducing you to Susan Harris O’Connor and we invite you to read her words and learn from her with us.

Visit Blog

Susan’s Book

Filling in the Stories

June 5, 2o2o

If you are parenting children who haven’t been in your home since birth, you don’t have access to their entire histories. This likely means that they don’t either. Today Staci gives us some tips on how to help fill in the missing pieces of our foster and adopted children’s stories.

Don't Be Afraid of Your Children's Pasts

June 4, 2020

As foster and adoptive parents, we tend to fear talking to our children about the time before they entered our homes. Today Tera helps us understand that giving children a strong understanding of their stories is crucial to helping them heal from trauma, abuse and neglect.

Merging the Stories

June 3, 2020

Are you parenting a combination of biological and adopted children? Helping children who have joined our families later in life feel like a part of our families takes intentionality. Join Erika today as she gives us some insight on this topic.

Making Birth Family Conversations Easier

June 2, 2020

Do you struggle with talking to your children about their birth families? Today Monica gives us practical techniques to make those conversations with your foster and adopted children a whole lot easier!


Talking to Older Children about Hard Histories

June 1, 2020

Do you assume that teens in foster care aren’t thinking about their pasts if they aren’t talking about it? Well, then think again! Join Alex for some thoughts about making your home a safe place for teenagers to talk about their hard histories.

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Giving Yourself Grace Without Letting Yourself Go

May 29, 2020

With over-sharing on social media as the norm these days, it’s easy to confuse self-care with self-maintenance. Today Monica talks to us about the difference between the two and how to avoid “system breakdown” while giving ourselves grace for the hard days.


Finding Accountability for Self-Care

May 28, 2020

Who is going to make sure you get some self-care? Not your kids, that’s for sure! Today Nikki continues our discussion on the importance of self-care and how to find accountability to make it happen.


Little Nudges of Self-Care Make a Big Impact

May 27, 2020

We tend to put off little moments to ourselves because we think they won’t make a difference. Erika tells us why we need to change our thinking about taking small nudges of self-care throughout the day when we are parenting children who have experienced trauma.


Changing the Way We Think About Self-Care

May 26, 2020

Most of us think of self-care as a break: a vacation, a day off, or finding respite. Today Staci tells us how she accidentally figured out how to include self-care though her days when parenting was a challenge.


Helping Kids with Body Awareness - The Proprioceptive Sense

May 22, 2020

Do your children seem to always be kicking or hitting? It could be that they need activities to help with the sense called proprioception. Monica shows us how to do that on this morning’s Coffee with Chosen.


Tips for Kiddos on the Move - The Vestibular Sense

May 21, 2020

Whether your kiddo hates car rides or is climbing your walls, it’s important to understand how a sense of balance in foster and adopted children can have a big impact on behaviors. Join Staci today as she talks about the vestibular sense.

The Sense You Don't Know About

May 20, 2020

Are you parenting a child who doesn’t know when he’s dehydrated or a teenager who can’t seem to dress for the weather? He may be struggling with something called interoception. Today Tera tells us about this internal sense and gives us practical ways to help our kiddos improve in body awareness skills.

Sensory Processing - Touch

May 19, 2020

Do you struggle with not being “touchy-feely” but your kiddos are desperate for physical touch? Today Erika gives us lots of ideas to give children healthy touch so that our connection to them becomes stronger.

The Eight Senses: Taste and Smell

May 18, 2020

Does your kiddo from a hard place struggle with picky eating? Taste and smell are two senses that are closely tied together. Today Tera gives us some strategies for helping our children through these challenges.

An Introduction to the Eight Senses

May 17, 2020

Did you know that we actually have eight senses, not five! Gaining and understanding of a child’s entire sensory system can go a long way in helping calm hard behaviors. Today Tera makes “sense” of it all!

Remember to Remember

May 16, 2020

Children and teens with hard histories sometimes struggle with memories. It’s our job to help them recollect memories from today and from long ago. Today Staci shares some tips on how to do that.

Connect and Redirect

May 15, 2020

In The Whole-Brain Child by Dr. Dan Siegel and Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, we learn the concept of “connect and redirect,” which is a helpful technique to use when kiddos find themselves extremely upset. Nikki explains the concept and tells us how to use it within our families.

Increase the Family Fun Factor

May 14, 2020

In the helpful book called The Whole-Brain Child, Dr. Dan Siegel and Dr. Tina Payne Bryson encourage parents to “increase the family fun factor.” Today Erika shows us how her entire family does this.

Download the LET’S GET MOVING checklist

Move It or Lose It

May 13, 2020

Encouraging kiddos to move their bodies can be the key to avoiding a meltdown. Today we talk about the concept of “Move It or Lose It” from The Whole-Brain Child by Dr. Dan Siegel and Dr. Tina Payne Bryson.

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Dr. Siegel's Name It to Tame It

May 12, 2020

In The Whole-Brain Child by Dr. Dan Siegel, he talks about the importance of story-telling to help children and teens heal from trauma. Today Staci summarizes this concept and explains “Name It to Tame It.”


Tips for Telehealth Therapy with Children

May 11, 2020

Is your child or teen struggling with seeing a therapist over the phone or computer? Today Tera shares some practical tips for how to make telehealth appointments easier and more effective.


A Special Mother's Day Message

May 10, 2020

At Chosen, we love to celebrate your victories with your kiddos and teens. We also love to walk alongside you on those days that don’t seem victorious. Tune in to hear today’s special Mother’s Day encouragement from Angela, Chosen’s Chief Operating Officer. Happy Mother’s Day!


"Re Dos" with Kiddos

May 9, 2020

Do your kiddos struggle with whining, disrespect, or a sassy tone? Guiding them through “re-dos” is a great way to turn that behavior around. Today Jenni and her son show us how a “do-over” can avoid a full-blown meltdown.


I'm Sorry Tickets

May 8, 2020

Ever blown it or messed up as a parent? We all have. NOW WHAT? It is time to try out some of the most powerful words in the English language – “I Am Sorry” and “Please Forgive Me.” Today we give you a tool to help us repair when we mess up with our kids.



Download your I’m Sorry Tickets

Karyn Purvis Institute for Childhood Development Blog

Daily "Redos" in Marriage

May 7, 2020

Kids are the only ones who need to practice making things right when they do something wrong! Sometimes parents need to to be apologizing to each other. In today’s Coffee with Chosen, Alex and his wife, Caroline, discuss how to accomplish “redos” within marriage.



Apologizing vs. Repairing

May 6, 2020

Are you frustrated with kids who just won’t apologize like they mean it? Today Erika shows us the difference between an apology and a repair when our children from hard places are fighting with each other.

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Read more on Repairing

How Parents Repair

May 5, 2020

Are you scared that apologizing to your kids will backfire? Monica gives us some reasons why asking forgiveness from her children does just the opposite, and how she repairs as a mom.


Re-Dos with Teens

May 4, 2020

When a teenager messes up, it’s easy for things to spiral out of control. Today Tera gives us guidance about how to offer teens a chance to “re do” bad attitudes and start over again.


Repairing and Re-doing

May 3, 2020

Do you struggle with getting off the negative cycle of resentment when kiddos mess up and don’t apologize? Grab your coffee and learn about the power of repairing relationships during the daily interactions within our families.


Expecting Hard Moments

May 2, 2020

Hard moments are to be expected when parenting children from hard places. Today we actually show you what it looks like to use trauma-informed techniques in a real-life hard parenting moment.


Parenting Expectations within Marriage

May 1, 2020

Are you and your spouse on different pages when it comes to parenting your foster and adopted kiddos? On today’s Coffee with Chosen, Staci and her husband discuss situations when their parenting expectations were different, and what they did to get back on the same page. Are you and your spouse on different pages when it comes to parenting your foster and adopted kiddos? On today’s Coffee with Chosen, Staci and her husband discuss situations when their parenting expectations were different, and what they did to get back on the same page.



Parents take this quiz about differing expectations separately then sit down and discuss the results together. The goal is not to agree on everything but to understand each other and discuss a unified “team” approach with the kids. We don’t feel truly loved until we feel understood. Take time to understand your spouse and how they view the parenting challenges at home.


Expectations for Stages, Not Only Ages

April 30, 2020

Do you often think, “Why isn’t he acting his age?” We expect children to act according to what the birth certificate says, but we need to consider behaviors of children with trauma in light of developmental stages and not just chronological ages.


Different Expectations for Different Kiddos

April 29, 2020

In the name of consistency, should the expectations we have for our biological children be the same for the children who have experienced trauma? Erika dives into this difficult topic so that we set trauma-informed expectations in our families.


Expectations for Anniversaries of Trauma

April 28, 2020

Our brains are hardwired to member bad things that have happened to us, and that is especially true for children who have experienced trauma, abuse and neglect. Today we explore practical tips for helping kiddos through times of the year that can possibly remind them of their hard histories.




Are you looking for additional support? Join us for our weekly Parent to Parent Support Group. Save Your Seat Today

Resetting Our Expectations

April 27, 2020

When our expectations don’t match reality, we often live in a state of resentment. This week on Coffee with Chosen, we will be exploring how to reset our expectations to reflect the needs of foster and adopted children struggling with the effects of trauma, abuse and neglect.


Homeschooling: Excellence vs Perfection

April 26, 2020

Are you feeling the weight of having to do everything just right when it comes to homeschooling kids from hard places during a pandemic? Find some encouragement this morning as we discuss the difference between perfection and excellence.


Questions You've Been Asking About Chosen

April 25, 2020

Are you wondering what we do at Chosen other than drink coffee in the morning? Tune in today for the answers to some frequently asked questions about our trauma-informed parenting help and support services.

Check In with Your Kids and Yourself!

April 24, 2020

Today we are giving you a tool to help when trauma behaviors and emotions have spiraled out of control. Nikki gives us the key ways to check in with ourselves and our kiddos to help us go from chaotic to controlled.

Download our Check-In Coloring Page

Breathing Techniques

April 21, 2020

Deep breathing seems weird, but it’s very effective in keeping simmering emotions from reaching the boiling point. Join Shanna today to learn two key techniques for regulation.


Letting Grief Bubble To The Surface

April 20, 2020

How are you and your kiddos handling the news that school has been cancelled for the rest of the year? Join us for suggestions on how to help children and teens with sadness about what they are missing because of Covid-19.


Homeschooling: Many Teachers, But Only One Mom And Dad

April 19, 2020

With the news that schools across the country are closed for the remainder of the year, parents are finding themselves homeschooling children with trauma for longer than expected. Erika gives us a word of encouragement to help us endure the academic responsibility that is before us.


Connecting Ideas With Your Teen Girls

April 18, 2020

Our team members who are parenting teenage daughters are sticking together during this quarantine! Today Tera shares with you many of the ideas we have used to connect with our girls.

Compromises - When Choices Don't Work

April 17,2020

Yesterday Nikki showed us how to give our children choices. Today, she shows us what to do when choices aren’t working very well.


Choices - Letting your Little Ones Feel in Control

April 16, 2020

Yesterday we told you why it’s important for kiddos from hard places to feel in control. Today Nikki shows you how you practically implement this in your home.



Read more about CHOICES on the Chosen Blog


April 15, 2020

Today we begin a multi-part series on the importance of helping children from hard places feel like they are in control. Tera starts us off by giving us an overview of why control is such a need for our kiddos and what it looks like in the midst of challenging behavior.


Teens in a Pandemic

April 14, 2020

Do you have bored teenagers sitting at home? In keeping with yesterday’s discussion on connecting with boys, today two of Tera’s teenagers talk about how they are coping during quarantine.

Connecting with Sons

April 13, 2020

Meet Alex, one of Chosen’s Care Managers. Today he gives us some great ideas on how to connect with boys in your home.

Connecting Ideas on Easter

April 12, 2020

Holidays can be difficult for kiddos with hard histories. On today’s Coffee with Chosen Erika shares some connecting questions to ask your children on Easter.

Connecting with the Proprioceptive System

April 11, 2020

Staci and two of her teens show us how to connect outside by using the proprioceptive system. She shares her three favorite exercises to help kiddos and teens stay regulated.


 Connecting With Your School Aged Kids

April 10, 2020

Erika and her kiddos talk about what they do to help with connection in their family. Don’t miss these great ideas for elementary-aged children!

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